Whether you’re just starting to question your marriage, or if you’ve been contemplating divorce for years, I’d like to share with you…
5 Ways to think about, prepare for and commit to making your Big Decision with clarity and confidence:
1. Relax, you don’t have to make your Big Decision today.
Your best choice is made when it comes from clarity, not confusion.
Eventually, you will have to decide whether you want to stay or leave your marriage. However, if you’re waking up frustrated and telling yourself, “That’s it. I’m done. Today’s the day that I’m finally going to decide whether to stay or leave my marriage!”, you’re putting way too much pressure on yourself. Stop sacrificing your sanity and embrace the space of indecision. Make peace with the fact that you’re simply not ready to decide–yet. As long as you keep making this a priority in your life, you’ll be taking steps that will eventually lead you closer to your decision.
2. Schedule time to focus on making this decision and then spend the rest of your day living life.
Your best choice is made when you commit to spending the time, energy and resources necessary to come to a final conclusion AND find ways to still live a life you absolutely love TODAY.
When you live your life by CHOICE and not by chance, you realize that hope is not an effective strategy. If you want to make clear choices with confidence, then it’s vital to start exploring your life at a deeper level for change to happen. It’s time to ask the tough questions, dig into the roots of what’s really making you unhappy, uncover what you want (and don’t want) in your life, figure out what’s negotiable and not negotiable in your relationship, learn how to have real and raw conversations AND live a life you absolutely love starting RIGHT NOW. The sands of time wait for no one.
3. Get up close and personal to see how you’re being affected by YOUR own choices.
Your best choice is made when you can examine it from all angles.
I know how easy it is to point fingers and say “If only she would pay attention to my needs, then I wouldn’t be eating so much” or “If only he would help out with the kids, I wouldn’t be wanting to leave”. Whatever the reason, it’s important for YOU to take responsibility for YOUR actions. If the number on the scale is going up or if you’re not happy with the life you’re living–then only YOU have the power to change that. Stand strong in your POWER TO CHOOSE. Learn healthy ways to deal with your emotions, to respond in peace rather than react in anger and give yourself some extra pats on the back for your courage and determination to figure this out. You got this!
4. Want the best and be prepared for the worst.
Your best choice is made when you have a “Plan B”.
When you create “safety nets”, they’ll catch you if your Plan A falls through. John Lennon said it best. “Life happens while you’re busy making other plans.” I bet your mind has already envisioned worst-case scenarios. While they most likely won’t come true, it’s always a good idea to be prepared for them just in case. You’ll feel more confident and secure when you know you can handle anything that comes your way.
5. Be true to who you are.
Your best choice is made when you honor and respect your beliefs, values, morals, and choices.
If you’re asking family, friends or loved ones for advice on what to do about your situation, then be prepared for a variety of answers you may not like. Some will tell you to stay with him because you have a great life. Others will tell you to leave her because you’re so miserable. In the end, only YOU can make a choice that matches who you are and the life you want to live.
As you’ve realized, answering the question, “Should I stay or leave my marriage?” is not a simple “yes” or “no” answer.
If you want to make a well thought out, regret-free decision, then it’s time to schedule your FREE No-Obligation EMERGE-N-SEE Call.
You’ll get a glimpse of:
- What you want (and don’t want) for your tomorrow
- What’s really stopping you from making clear choices
- How coaching can guide you towards making your decision with clarity and confidence.
I’ve coached men and women all around the world. We can meet in person, speak on the phone or connect through the internet. If you can’t find a time on my scheduler that matches your needs, feel free to reach out to me email@example.com and we’ll find a time that works for you.
Download my FREE Guide "5 Small Ways to Bring Peace Back into Your Life..Even though you have this Big Decision to make.
You don't have to sacrifice your sanity.